Are you happy? Could you be happier?

As you might already know from first-hand experience, how to be happy is anything but a simple subject.

Consider the following questions:

• Are you happy? What about happy “enough”?

• Should happiness be the ultimate goal? Are there things in your life that that trump happiness?

• If we try to maximize happiness, should we maximize pleasure? Minimize pain? Be our most authentic selves?

• Is overall life satisfaction the same as happiness?

• Why does the more we strive for happiness, the farther it gets away?

While researchers have attempted to explore many of the above questions, there is no one definitive answer. In fact, many researchers prefer to describe their findings as “descriptive,” rather than “prescriptive” - meaning one that attempts to illustrate and learn from people’s current relationships with happiness, without assuming they are the best fit for all. Or, as Sonja Lyubomirsky puts it: “happiness must be defined from the perspective of the person.”

But by more frequently and mindfully exploring these very questions, we will start to feel more confident in our approach to pursuing a happy and fulfilling life, and attain a greater sense of perspective than we often find ourselves with otherwise just going through the motions.

Different Ways of Thinking About Happiness

State vs. Trait Happiness

To begin, when discussing happiness it’s important to acknowledge the difference between state and trait happiness. State happiness typically involves our current mood and emotions, such as feeling content, joyful, or excited. You can think of trait happiness, on the other hand, as more a more stable and enduring characteristic. For example, an ongoing feeling of fulfillment or life satisfaction that withstands the up’s and down’s of bad days and more difficult emotions. Or, as David Myers defines happiness: “A pervasive sense that life is good.” When it comes to state and trait happiness, we don’t have to choose one or the other. Arguably they are interrelated, and we can aim to increase both.

Being Intentional About Happiness

According to Sonja Lyubomirsky’s research, happiness is:

• 10% life circumstances

• 40% intentional activity

• 50% genetic

Without negating life circumstances too much, it is interesting to note that while GDP has tripled over the last 50 years, life satisfaction in the US has remained flat. Moreover, depression rates have increased tenfold (Flourish). While it’s fair to assume that growing inequality may come into play, you need not look very far to see the countless examples of the people who have benefitted the most from economic advancement that are still deeply unhappy to underscore this point.

Instead, Lyubomirsky and colleagues suggest “happy and unhappy individuals differ considerably in their subjective experience and construal of the world” (“The Promise of Sustainable Happiness”). Our perception of our lives is one of the greatest powers we have within our control to influence our happiness.

For example, are you rushing through your day, just trying to check off one task after the next? Or are you savoring your morning coffee? Spending quality time with friends? Noticing the present moment?

Are you comparing yourselves with others, constantly consumed by what you don’t have? Or do you take the time to “count your blessings,” and be grateful for all that you do have?

Happiness and Genetics

Finally, there are genetics. While it might sound fatalistic at first - you’re born with a certain amount of dispositional happy - in fact, the evolving field of epigenetics is challenging many of our assumptions about how nature and nurture interact. Epigenetics is the study of how factors such as changes to our environment can actually change the way our genes get expressed - or, in simplistic terms, what can turn them “on” and “off.” In fact, scientists are learning that everything from diet and lifestyle, to - yes - even thoughts, perceptions and beliefs can change the way our genes get expressed. There is even some evidence that these changes then go on to become inherited as such.

Rather than thinking of it as 50/50 or 80/20, we might think about it as a sort of “loop.” Our biology can affect our behavior, and in certain situations, our actions can go on to physiologically impact our biology.

Things You Can Do To Be Happier

So, if we can change our happiness, what are some ways we can go about doing it?

In 1969, Norman Bradburn showed that rather than simply existing on a single continuum, pleasant and unpleasant emotional states are somewhat independent. Essentially happiness is not just the absence of negative emotions or unhappiness - we have to actively pursue thoughts and activities that will increase our happiness. In doing so, oftentimes we can actually rewire our brains to build and strengthen the neural pathways associated with happiness, or those associated with “happy” chemicals such as serotonin, dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin.

Here are just a few evidence-based activities that have shown to increase happiness or subjective well-being:

• Practice acts of kindness

• Keep a gratitude journal

• Write down 3 good things that happened every day and why

• Get out in nature

• Do something in which you find a state of “flow”

• Visualize your best possible self

• Socialize with friends

• Forgive someone through a letter

• Find the bright side in a situation

• Practice optimistic thinking

• Be present-oriented

• Meditate

• Exercise

• Laugh

And the list goes on. You might be surprised at how small and simple some of these techniques are. But ask yourself honestly how much of your attention or what percent of your day you currently put toward any of them. In fact, perhaps if we started focusing more on the little things, rather than waiting for the job or the vacation or the partner to make us happy, we’d realize that to be happy we actually need look no further than right here and right now.

It is also important to know that “person-activity fit” have a significant effect on results from person to person, meaning different people will resonate with some activities more than others, which is why it can be helpful to do some deep reflecting on your own strengths and values, or even work with someone on finding what works best for you. It also means that you don’t have to check them all off! Find something that is inherently interesting and rewarding to you so that it becomes self-reinforcing and feels like little effort.

Finally, it’s ok and can actually be important to vary the intentional activities you pursue to boost your happiness. In the same way that we quickly adapt to our life circumstances, such as a raise or a new car, we can also habituate to a lot of the activities we involve ourselves in. Researchers call this phenomenon hedonic adaptation, or the “hedonic treadmill.” However recognizing and leveraging this can be a powerful tool. We can moderate this effect by intentionally injecting variety, or many would even argue that the essence of mindfulness can counter our sense of mindless habituation in the first place.  

So allow yourself to stay open and curious and continue to experiment. Don’t forget that the quickest way to kill happiness is to seek it too hard, or to focus too much on what you should be doing.